As I sit here with heavy eyes
Staring into lights
Red, green, orange, yellow
All flashing, coming, going,
As ear buds in my ears fail to silence the outside noise
I rest under the cotton of my sweater, keeping warm
Everyday, I ask when he’ll be here
Everyday, I feel cold
As cars fly by,
Old, new, beat up, and polluting
Not me, but my mind
And the world I make up by it
Closer, brighter, faster
These lights pass by me
As I sit here with tears
Wondering where you are
My love, I have waited
And will continue to do so
At this cold stop,
I am not afraid to admit my love for you
And that you could make me cry
And I will continue to wait
When that one you’ve been searching for you’ve finally found,
But you have no way of telling him.
That you’ve become infatuated, in love,
For he is beautiful and some.
Be he the one to make it last?
For your love for one another will only excite.
Be you the one to warm his heart?
For both your lives shall be full of light.
His heart is that of gold,
And arms that of steel.
As a way to counter yours,
You, being graceful and soft to the touch.
And ever more so nurturing,
Satisfaction in both mind and body.
Warm and full in the life of love,
Thus, creating the complimentary pair.
May your love only breathe the life of fire,
And burn as one.
For it is true that two people can come together,
In a puzzle-like piece.
And as one,
Together the two of you will be,
‘Tis the season to find love
‘Tis the season to be loved
I feel that every day that passes by
I continue to forget you
As I continue to no longer see your face
And the memories that we have created
I start to become hallow;
A man devoid of thoughts and emotions
Yet most days when you do seem to cross my mind,
I remind myself that no,
You have not been forgotten!
Just a slight blur from time to time,
A blur that needs to be focused just a little
From our playful wrestling days after watching Power Rangers
To our physical and bruising combats,
Usually ending with me in tears
In those days,
When you do cross my mind,
I only wish and hope that you are okay
Even if you are no longer near
Missing you, we all miss you
Wishing that what had happened never did
My brother and sisters ask for you always
And do not forget Mom
Oh, she especially!
And as we think of you,
We also think of him
Oh, how he has traveled to you after
All the hard years we have spent with him
And now that he is in your world,
I do hope that the two of you have found each other
I do hope that the two of you are okay
May you both whom I redeem loving and kind spirits,
And always thought of,
Even if it gets fuzzy from time to time,
To my Brother and Father.
Although beauty can be seen in anguish,
It is beginning to consume me entirely
And I cannot continue to drown in it
Angry about what is and what isn’t,
I find myself at a freeze stop
Unhappy to have been given this life,
Yet this mind is to young to understand
To overcome these naive feelings,
I am just about absolute I want to disappear
If only I was a solo man,
Maybe then I wouldn’t feel all this weight,
Like a burden,
I am obligated to stay
Unless I can find it within myself to completely no longer care,
I can disappear
The funny thing about all of this is simply knowing that the world will indeed go black
I keep on this track
Waiting for my time to disappear,
Cause no meaning exists in this life,